Bleeding Without Hurt

You came to me in an unexpected way.
You were an unwelcome guest for me
in the middle of nowhere, playing with my friends.
Why did I outgrow them?
I never expected anything like it in my entire life.

You changed my life in the blink of an eye.
I didn’t know how to accept your unwelcome visit.
All alone in my little dark room
I was shattered, disappointed, and ashamed,
But I have to accept you in order to accept myself.

They told me to hide myself.
They told me that I’m not clean.
They kept their distance whenever you were with me.
They were afraid to accept you because you are the bitter truth.
But I’m glad they did because you give me a chance 
to be different from others, a chance to grow 
and be a lady.

I know you are not impure to me; rather, you bring relief.
I know you won’t always be easy but I have to accept you,
I know you won’t always be predictable but I want to accept you.
I know you won’t always be perfect but neither is life.
Period, you were an unwelcome guest 
but now you are a blessing to me.

You are a sign of health and I hope one day they will realise that
You are unpredictable, but if there is one thing I count on in my life
It’s you.
You are the only true thing that has ever happened to me.
And I can imagine a world where it feels so good to bleed, bleeding without hurt –
How beautiful it is, how beautiful it is, how beautiful it is.

Sudi Omar Noor is a 23-year-old Somali living in Kakuma Refugee Camp. A poet, photographer and content creator, she finished primary and secondary school in Kakuma and is currently sitting for her high school diploma with Amala. She is passionate about storytelling, and is an active advocate for peace and girls in education and sport. Sudi is also the founder of the female empowerment initiative Girl Power Team, which runs two projects – #PadsForHappiness, which distributes sanitary products to school-going girls, and #BeMyPeace, a program that educates local youths about peace and conflict resolution.